No matter how much i hate that i have to sleep with this heavy heart, i know i am more fortunate than alot more people out there. Just last night, one of my sec3 junior passed away.how fragile life can get? way much than anyone can think of. So whenever you are sad or really depressed, why not take the time, reflect on how you have not told your loved ones that you really love them? Why, instead of being sad and emo and all, take the chance to realise, the sadness that you are experiencing, can never be compared to the family memebers of those who lost their dearest kins. Up till this moment, what i had just said may just be mere bullshits to you bc i know, at the end of the day, it's hard to kick away a certain kind of sadness. It's like.. it's stick to you forever. it's like, you are numb to it. Or should i even put it in a sense that, you cant get rid of that numbness.

zzz it's hurting so fucking much right now i dont fucking deserve this
I thought this feeling had been gone, for good. I let it fade, and I thought it did. But who am I
kidding. It's still here. It's never going away. I hate it.

Always tell yourself, the people who matter dont mind, the people who mind, definitely dont matter.